Wednesday 24 September 2008

trust

Have you ever had a climbing partner let you down? Ever been fooled into thinking you're safe: they're solid, reliable, completely trustworthy, only then to be let down when it really mattered? Maybe they were simply looking the other way, focussing on something else, just for a second...just long enough for a hold to snap, a foot to slip...

I was dropped once. I didn't really know my belayer - I'd only met him an hour or so beforehand but hey - he said the right things, he was a climber, he was safe.
It hurt a bit when I hit the ground, nothing major but it was enough to make me think - who am I trusting? What reason do I have to believe that I'm not going to be let down?


I wrote the above in a late night email to a friend a couple of days ago - I was annoyed and trying to make a point about something rather more menial (something along the lines of not responding to phone calls or texts). Reading back over it has made me think.

The past few days have been hard. One of my close family members is critically ill in hospital and has been since friday - thankfully now she's beginning to improve and we're all hopeful of a good outcome. I've felt stressed at work and haven't been able to keep with the normal routines of climbing and exercise. All of this I feel has triggered some philosphical thinking.

So why do we trust people without reason? Is this a normal aspect of human nature or am I just a fool? I just don't know. I like to trust people, it's just the way I am but sometimes you get let down, it's all part of the game I suppose.

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